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2021.11.27 02:00 Kikisjewelryservice Updated what I have for trade! Trying to see what I can get! Not too firm on some, just ask me! (Some are pictured twice)
|submitted by Kikisjewelryservice to BSTsquishmallow [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 konbanwa_bitches A Baka's guide to the Psychology of Kazuya and Chizuru Part IV: The Perfect Boyfriend
What makes Kazuya perfect for Chizuru? We already saw what made Chizuru fall in love with him in Part III. But what makes him perfect? Because he alone managed to break her suit of armor.
We finished Part III with a question. What is Kazuya’s persona? The answer to that will also help us to understand does he manage to break Chizuru’s suit of armor. His anima makes him a hero, but Kazuya is not a knight in shining armor. Neither is Chizuru a damsel in distress. On the contrary, it’s actually Chizuru the one who’s wearing an armor.
Hello again readers. This is Part IV of the series: Understanding KanOkari that I am co-writing with u/DjD0325. Please make sure to read the previous parts if you haven’t done already as every subsequent part has been built upon the themes and ideas discussed in its previous part.
Kazuya, the dark horse
What do we mean when we say Kazuya broke through her armor?
We discussed some panels in the Part III where we saw how Chizuru showed how she felt inadequate, showed she was self-conscious and overall felt inferior. Now these fears and doubts are things she’d never share with anyone at all. Not even Sayuri. But who is she sharing those with, in those panels? Kazuya of course.
Outside of the theatre: Chizuru flip-flops between venting out her feelings of inadequacy one moment https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-52-page-19 and becoming self-conscious the next moment https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-52-page-20, and then going back to venting again https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-52-page-23 . It’s as if she is struggling to keep her mask on as it is slipping away and fails at it. A day later she admits to him that she indeed needed that support: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-55-page-18.html For someone who pretends that everything is ok to everyone, Chizuru saying this much to Kazuya is actually significant.
On the balcony -page-1: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-61-page-4 Chizuru becoming vulnerable, expressing her past, her sorrow and how her life is in shambles and asking if that sounds scary (the Jet Yau translation is wrong. She asks if that sounds scary – as in “do I sound like a crazy girl with a crazy dream?”). And she expresses her feelings of inadequacy again: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-61-page-7 This is different from the last time because she doesn’t struggle to keep the mask on, but only asks him if he thinks she sounded scary. She is self-conscious but this time she is fine with the mask slipping away.
On the balcony-page- 2: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-103-page-17 Chizuru expressing her despair with teary eyes. She has never once showed this face to anyone in the manga. She is completely vulnerable. What has changed here from the earlier time on the balcony is, now she isn’t even becoming immediately self-conscious about it. Only on the next day, after Kazuya inadvertently reminds her, that he’s only a neighbour, she remembers what happened and feels embarrassed about it https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-104-page-18. In a later chapter, she says this: : https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-160-page-8.html (only to end up crying in his arms later that evening) and yet this proud girl went to his door asking him to save her.
And the tears flow: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-164-page-19 This time, even though she is feeling embarrassed later, she is actually happy that she vented out to Kazuya. That’s what she tells Sayuri. That she felt cleansed. https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-166-page-19
Chizuru shares her past here: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-136-page-8, shared her struggles here: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-136-page-9 What’s different about this time? Isn’t this the same as what she did on the balcony in Ch.61? Do you notice something? Here she isn’t self-conscious. Here she is dying to tell him everything she felt. The same things that she was hesitant to tell before because she was afraid what he’d think of her, but told him anyway. Also in Ch.61, she was acting dejected. But in Ch.136 she is hopeful. Kazuya has made her look forward to the future and she is happy to tell him how she feels about it.
Can you see the progress?
From struggling to keeping the mask on in Ch.52, to hesitantly wanting to tell him about her past and struggles in Ch.61, to desperately wanting to tell him about her past and struggles in Ch.136.
From becoming teary eyed in front of him in Ch.103 and feeling embarrassed about it a couple of days later to bursting into tears to him in Ch.164 and feeling happy about it a couple of days later.
What happened in Chapter 164 was not a sudden event. It was the culmination of Chizuru opening up to Kazuya in her own time and pace over the course of their relationship.
And this is not where it ends. Do you remember what else we spoke about Chizuru’s shadow? That she hides her desire to feel loved and to be in love. To feel that she needs someone with her always. Has she ever told anyone about this desire? https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-179-page-14 Ta-da!! The shadow becomes the self when she is with Kazuya!! So that’s the progress. From sharing her inadequacies, to revealing fears, to crying in his arms, to telling him she wants to be loved. And that too using the same words Kazuya used: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-61-page-14. This here is the progress that most of us have missed while eagerly looking for declarations of love.
The Kazuya quotient
So why does she open up only to Kazuya? Love isn’t the answer. People in love do not necessarily feel emotionally safe. Chizuru, who is insecure and guarded isn’t going to open up to Kazuya just because she is in love. She is a mature woman and she knows better.
If Katsuhito is the idealized version of a man in a Chizuru’s mind, does that mean Chizuru thinks of Kazuya as the ideal man? Isn’t he a hero too, who saved her from drowning, who saved Sumi from the thugs and who even made her dream come true? Beyond her feelings, what does Chizuru think of Kazuya? https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-125-page-5. Precious, right.
Chizuru knows Kazuya isn’t precious just for her. She knows he’d be precious to any girl he ends up with. She has known this for the longest time and she completely believed in that when she spoke about him to Mami on the bridge. So, does she idealize him?
She doesn’t and she shouldn’t. Because Chizuru who is ridden with inferiority complex, is not going to be in a successful relationship if she idealizes her partner. The first rule for her to be comfortable in a relationship is to understand nobody is perfect, especially her partner. Else there’d be no communication and there’d be a constant feeling of unworthiness, resulting in their relationship breaking down.
Here’s how she describes Kazuya to Sayuri: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-143-page-17 and https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-143-page-18. I can see readers who’d say “No. She doesn’t mean all that. She is just being like a schoolgirl talking trash about her crush”. I wouldn’t disagree. That’s true indeed. But the truth is, she doesn’t idealize him. She has seen him in his worst, ever since their second date. And what she described to Sayuri is Kazuya’s persona: “Kazuya, the clown”
Kazuya the clown-fish
Told you it wasn’t that difficult to guess this archetype, right?
She knows he is a hero and a clown rolled into one. In fact, the drowning scene shows both sides of Kazuya.
He is the hero who saved her: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-15-page-5
He is the clown who ended up being saved by her: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-15-page-6
“The rescuer in need of rescue? How can you possibly be this pathetic?” These words say it all. And this panel too: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-15-page-7
She knows he cries and acts pathetic, but still won’t give up on what he promised: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-6-page-24
She can take inspiration from him and still not feel any inhibitions in showing him, her fears, inadequacies, and despair. That’s because she can relate with him. And that is why she thinks they are the same: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-52-page-22
Chizuru is correct when she said they are the same. But she is wrong about what they are the same in. They are the same in that they both work hard with a single point focus towards their dreams. Kazuya tenacity inspires her and she wants to be like him. That's why she relates herself with him thinking they are both the same. She has believed this for a while now. But when she fails, she also thinks they both are going to be failures because, again, she relates with him. She sees her failure as proof for his impending failure. And that came out as her anguish in the above panel in Ch.52. But when Kazuya tells her to chase that dream, she was immediately able to gain back her inspiration: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-55-page-20. As she says she needed that push. Because she believes in Kazuya and he has inspired her always.
Does Kazuya agree though? https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-52-page-24
There are indeed differences between these two, but like Chizuru, Kazuya gets it wrong too.
Here is what Sayuri says about Kazuya and Chizuru: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-58-page-9 and https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-58-page-11
Everyone probably remembers the second panel here where Sayuri is talking about Chizuru’s suit of armor. But how many of us remember the first panel? Where Sayuri talks about knowing that we are weak and fragile and that knowledge helps us to get back up again and pursue happiness. That’s what she saw about Kazuya.
Chizuru denies to herself that she can be weak or that she can falter. That’s because she pushes her desire to be loved into her “shadow” archetype and she projects her persona as a never-failing strong girl to hide her shadow. And when she falters, she simply doesn’t know what to do. She loses hope. She immediately doubts her ability even though she doesn’t doubt her dream. That’s her inferiority complex driving her.
On the contrary, Kazuya doubts the dream but doesn't doubt his ability: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-6-page-23
He calls his attraction pointless and calls himself a pile of trash for hanging on to it and even getting Chizuru involved, but doesn't say he can't achieve it. He is acknowledging that he is hanging on to it. Even after knowing that Mami probably has forgotten him long ago and even when he doubts his own feelings for Mami: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-41-page-10, he wouldn’t give up on the promise: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-41-page-11, because commitment matters the most.
That’s his persona as the clown driving him. What is the quality of a clown? What does one need to bear the humiliation and hurt? Pain tolerance. That’s the quality of a clown and that’s the greatest quality of Kazuya. He is at peace with his “self” archetype – of his need to march on with optimism even when he falters. For that he bears humiliation and that shows as his persona. That’s what he did even as a kid, ignoring that Kibe and everyone else will laugh at him when he fails.
That’s Kazuya the eternal optimist, the hero, and the clown. Ultimately Chizuru can admire him and still relate to him. She can love him without idealizing him.
The clown’s pain tolerance
Kazuya being a clown is mollifying Chizuru’s inferiority complex. But is that all there is to it? How emotionally safe does Chizuru feel with Kazuya? What is emotional safety even?
Do you trust that someone you love will safeguard your secrets? Do you trust that someone you love will never use your secrets against you? Do you trust that the person you love will not judge you for your secrets? All that is feeling emotionally safe.
Now, the last point is something Chizuru has already felt with Kazuya. That is why she was able to open up to him overcoming her inferiority complex and her insecurities.
What about the first two? Let us make something clear here. Chizuru did not trust Kazuya initially. But remember, the author plays God here and if he decides all of Chizuru’s secrets should be known to Kazuya, he will make it be. If you have read Part I, you’d have read u/DjD0325 explaining “synchronicity”. This all came to be only because there were way too many coincidences that are unthinkable. Kazuya getting dumped right around when Chizuru starts being a rental girlfriend, Kazuya and Chizuru being neighbours, their grandmas knowing each other, and them going to the same university. And also, the accidents helped too. Kuri hiring Ruka and Kazuya finding about her acting career were accidents. In eastern cultures this is called “the red string of fate”. If two people are meant to be together, every thing that happens is for them to come together and nothing can stop that. That is why Kazuya – and only Kazuya – knew about all of Chizuru’s secrets even when she wasn’t ready to divulge anything to him.
She wasn’t even ready to tell him about her acting career and was very embarrassed when she had to reveal it to him: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-31-page-13. But even at that point, she was already witnessing Kazuya’s resolve to keep her secrets safe. Except for this instance: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-2-page-15, where he used her secret against her, he has always gone to extreme measures to keep her secret safe. Here too, he immediately went back to being deferential after she called him a scum: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-2-page-16.
We did talk about the clown’s pain tolerance, right? Just look at all these times.
The clown suffers falls from heights: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-27-page-7; bridge fall
The clown takes punches (and slaps) and rolls with it: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-12-page-3; https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-55-page-17
The clown endures humiliation and insults and still kept a smile on: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-5-page-14; https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-73-page-11
Except for that fall from the bridge scene (Ch.), in every other instance he accepted all the pain to keep Chizuru’s secret. While doing all that, Kazuya kept blaming it all on himself.
When he entered into a trial relationship with Ruka for the sake of Chizuru, he blamed himself for the situation even though it was in no way his fault that Ruka found out about Chizuru: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-25-page-12. But even Chizuru knows it wasn’t his fault and it was her doing that he is in a trial relationship with a girl he doesn’t want to be with: https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-31-page-24
It isn’t just important that Kazuya knew about her secrets. How he protected them at all costs, is what makes him different. Chizuru has seen all of that and she started to trust him little by little. For instance, when she entrusts Sumi to him on a rental date, it was because she knew he will be able to help her grow. And Kazuya did prove himself at that time. She wasn’t afraid to tell him that she is being scouted for a movie and that a big-name director is going to watch her perform. But her level of trust in him is revealed when she spoke to him about her past, her family, her life in shambles, and her fears while on the balcony. Those aren’t just things that Chizuru wanted to keep a secret, but wanted to bury deep within her heart and forget about. But she felt emotionally safe with a person that she loved and she wanted him to know about her fully.
Did she want to be comforted? Did she want at least one person in the world to know the true her? Did she want to see if he will distance himself from her if he knew everything about her, thus avoiding her a future heartbreak? We will never know. But she did tell him all that and that’s all that matters.
And all of these are because Kazuya is a clown. The very thing that makes him a bad MC, also makes him perfect for Chizuru.
(Something interesting happened when I was writing this part. I was discussing with u/DjD0325 to find if Kazuya fits the clown archetype and he confirmed Kazuya does. Just a few hours later ch.211 released. Guess what? https://manga4life.com/read-online/Kanojo-Okarishimasu-chapter-211-page-16. “I’m such a clown the entire country could point and laugh”. Made me think I got at least one archetype correct)
What about her attachment style?
I wrote so much about her attachment style in Part II. I would have hoped that the author showed us something about how she comes over it. But he has done that part of her growth in “the Girlfriend and the Paradise” arc entirely. When Nagomi talks to her and when Harumi talks to her, Chizuru has felt assured that this family is hers to keep. She still hasn’t been fully assured because of all the lies that form the foundation of this relationship. However, she still must grow and come in touch with her true self. We will see in the next part, how that could happen.
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2021.11.27 02:00 Arom1965 50 Ways to Get a Job
2021.11.27 02:00 baburajughansham Livee
2021.11.27 02:00 hentailes need karma
2021.11.27 02:00 AnonKanin You can pick three companions during the zombie apocalypse. What would be their professions?
2021.11.27 02:00 Stamora Hey guys, I found out where XQC lives
2021.11.27 02:00 raydenbrough I liked the idea...
|submitted by raydenbrough to stephenking [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 kishin_oni So I've had a pc for a bout 2 days, never used mouse and keybored before now. I'm pretty proud
|submitted by kishin_oni to apexlegends [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 Footbeard What is your must have perk?
It doesn't have to be rational. It's the perk you see on the pedestal and you simply must take it, irrespective of what else is there.
For me it's Telekinetic Kick. It's too much fun
submitted by Footbeard to noita [link] [comments]
2021.11.27 02:00 Nerdy1980s What's your Black Friday 2021 shopping haul?
2021.11.27 02:00 aunknxwn-user Are virgins turn ons or offs? Pls comment why
Also, does your answer change depending on if it's a hookup vs relationship? For ex, a friend of mine said it's a turn off in a hookup, but a turn on in a relationship.
submitted by aunknxwn-user to askgaybros [link] [comments]
2021.11.27 02:00 Nikhilguleria124 How do I stop the urge to torture people?
2021.11.27 02:00 byakuren-bot 「夫に代わって特におわび」 韓国・全斗煥元大統領夫人が謝罪 - 毎日新聞 - 毎日新聞
2021.11.27 02:00 popcorn_llama I don't know what wrong with me
So I'm literally going to have to beg my professor not to report me for accidental plagerisum again. I didn't realize I was plagerizing in the first paper and by the time I found out, I had already written and submitted the 2nd one with similar issue. I've never had this issue before this class and I really hate myself for it. I've sent him a email trying to explain myself but I feel like since it's the 2nd time he won't forgive me. Feeling super dumb and currently catostrophasizing. I don't want a permanent mark on my record especially since I want to go to grade school. Life is big sad rn.
submitted by popcorn_llama to CollegeRant [link] [comments]
2021.11.27 02:00 EEEEEEEE2e Bathroom like in the movies. Horror movies.
|submitted by EEEEEEEE2e to LiminalSpace [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 rubenespanyol Question about the new Google Drive app (Mac)
Is there a way to prevent the drive showing up on the sidebar every time the app is opened? It's annoying, and it doesn't disappear automatically when the app is closed.
Backup & Sync was much better and less intrusive.
MacOS Big Sur.
submitted by rubenespanyol to DataHoarder [link] [comments]
2021.11.27 02:00 Soup_Holiday my reaction when roman beat brock at crown jewel because he cheated yes im very salty
|submitted by Soup_Holiday to BrandonDE [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 SaigoBattosai Men with long hair, what advice can you give to other men trying to grow their hair long?
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2021.11.27 02:00 Makato_Yuki1523 I think I need to reflair. For the memes of course
|submitted by Makato_Yuki1523 to PCM [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 FashionGlamourBlog Stunning
|submitted by FashionGlamourBlog to FashionGlamourClicks [link] [comments]|
2021.11.27 02:00 HardwellM Finally i won the UCL with a iceland team
submitted by HardwellM to footballmanagergames [link] [comments]
2021.11.27 02:00 scope_creep My rights when airline cancels flight due to COVID.
Qatar Airlines just announced via Twitter that they won’t let passengers fly from South Africa ‘until further notice’. I’m due to travel back to the US from South Africa via Doha in 4 weeks time. What are my rights as a passenger in this case? I’m currently on phone with them, but waiting to get through. I thought maybe someone here could give me a quicker answer. As it happens I’m sitting on tarmac waiting to depart. Already sat through 4 hour delay. What a mess. Right now I just want to go home and get my money back.
submitted by scope_creep to asktravel [link] [comments]